Another Human | Why I Disappeared

Monday, September 5, 2016

Alas I am back and stating the obvious as always. I won't be surprised if I'm greeted back with swift who-the-hell-are-you-agains as I've been gone for about 1. . .2. . 3. . .oh yeah 6 months. Yup, six long months. Heck if you don't remember me I wouldn't blame you. . .but I remember all of you. I'm always disappearing on you aren't I? I kind of took an unannounced blogging break as I didn't feel all was well with me. You see I'm naturally an introspective being and once the stars misalign in my soul I find myself backing away from this place as I only want to create content that turn frowns into crowns that belong on their rightful owner's heads---that's you just so you know. Not only do I back away from here, but I find myself backing away from life entirely on this blind chase for answers that my mind cannot give me, but only a revelation that can grant a sigh of relief. I suppose my stars have been misaligned for quite some time now---something I didn't want to admit for ages. . .

I believe we're all introspective in one way or another, but I've been sitting upon this pile of broken stars for too long. You see I have these dreams just like all of you, but I can't help but wonder if the closest I'll ever get to them is the mere taste and glimpses I steal from my wild mind or. . .or if one day soon I'll have the guts to chase them in the fields of crazy daisies where dreams lie. Just thinking of the two inevitable outcomes drives me mad---but I finally found the messy words to the contents of my mind. While I was away don't think I gave up on this place---heck if I did that I wouldn't be here right now would I? My mama didn't raise no quitter. I just did some star gazing and some out there thinking and now I guess I'm just bringing it all to you. As long as you'd like to listen. I suppose the answers lies within the little piece I've written for all of you little humans out there who also feel their stars aren't as aligned as they should be. I hope this piece of writing and little ol' video of me finds you well. Although, your stars may feel scattered right now I swear that there's a field of daises just waiting for you nearby. Dreams can only begin on the ground and only then can they begin to reach for the sky~ 

Dear Me,

     It’s almost mid-January. . .February, March, April May, June, July and you’ve been trying to write this ever since December. Ever since your dainty daydreams became daring dreams that you are too afraid of. It’s mid January. . .February, March, April, May, June, July and everyone’s already long past written and maybe even abandoned their New Years Resolutions trying to fix or find a solution to this life---their life---weather it be shedding a few pounds to appear as if they have smaller bones or wearing the right lenses to see the roses a little better. Little wishes or big aspirations whispered to the sky’s ocean of stars all for one reason. . .to fill in the emptiness inside. It’s mid-January. . .February, March, April, May, June, July and you’re busying yourself thinking about all the time and hot water you’ve wasted on trying to find the right words and night baths. As if baby luke warm bath water webbed around your finger tips can wash away the universe and give you back time. But, miracles do not rest in the tick tock of the clock. . .but scared girls do. Because, you’re just a girl who’s afraid of the blade of her own mind when rather being afraid you should find the bravery to wield that very blade that makes the insides of you tremble to touch the universe in unforgettable ways.
     It’s mid-January. . .February, March, April, May, June, July and you’re still too busy looking for pretty words to explain the contents of your mind. Stop. Stop it right this instant! Your life cannot be found in a pool of ink on a poets pen and if the entirety of your life could be then it would be quite sad---because life shouldn’t be explained in words---life should leave you breathless and speechless as you desperately search for the loss of words to explain the beautiful unexplainable experiences we call life. And that will never happen if you are too busy using your heart as a star lit lantern looking for dreamy words instead of dreams to explain the attic stair cases of your extraordinary mind that make up the constellations scattered across the night skies.

     While we’re being over critical of ourselves and with justified reasons of course---it’s mid-January. . .February, March, April, May, June, July and you are too afraid to make a decision any decision for that fact---in fact you’re just a fraidy’ cat. You have so many dreams---so many beautiful dreams and I know you can’t see how we’re going to get there---how you’re going to get there---and I know that scares you senseless, but you are going to get there one day I swear. I don’t know how, when, or where, but I know it will happen as long as you believe. Believe like your very life depends on it, because for constellations sake your very dreams depends on every breath of belief. Believe like you only speak in the tongues of dreams mixed with strawberries and cream. Believe like you’re not lost no more. Believe like you’ve just arrived at the finish line for the unlost and the found. I can’t promise you won’t be afraid, but I can promise you will get there and that should be good enough for now.


With all the love

In the world,

Another Human

I'll see you soon
hopefully in the stars~